When the Flip Ever!
by Rurouni Idoru
Summary: What happens when I read a friend's fic, become flooded with ideas, and have been watching WAY too much SNL? This, of course! Likely to have more chapters, added as I feel like, or when I finish typing them.
1. Late Thursday Afternoon Live!

%@*#$!@(^!&*@%!*(@$^$@^!$^&)^#*!)&$#^&@(#%^&@%^#*(@%^!#&*#$%!#%^@&$%^@%!  
  
Author's Note: Okay, this story contains cameo appearances by some original charas, so beh-da. It was inspired by my good friend the Koneko Idoru, and I decided to make another show to put on the newly established Idoru network. WHOO! Two whole shows! That might equal an hour if we're lucky! WHOOHOO! *insert hip shaking here* Ah well. I'll get my cousin to hop on the bandwagon. She'll do it. Eventually. And now, a word required by the annoying stuffy legal people!  
  
Disclaimer: *yawn* Yeah, yeah, don't own RK, don't own SNL, don't own YYH, don't own FLCL, don't own the song, don't own most of the stuff in the story. Don't own some of those PS2 games I want either. No, that had nothing to do with the price of tea in China. However, the title "When the Flip Ever" does belong to me. So do my charas, and most of the voices in my head. Okay, so my charas and my voices are the same people, so what? Beh- da. On with the stupidity!  
  
%#*!%#*!%$(#%@!)#%@!&#%!&*#$@(!)@%%@!)@%#(@^%@%#$@!^@%#&%^*$@*$!*%^*$#  
  
Rurouni Idoru: *Picks nose absently with pinky, reminiscent of Haruko of FuriKuri.*  
  
Kenshin: *offscreen* Miss Demigoddess, we're on, that we are...  
  
RI: *Wiggles nose, messes around with hair, and scratches shoulders a little.*  
  
Kenshin: *offscreen* Miss Idoru, we're live, you know...  
  
RI: Right. KENSHIN! COME HERE!  
  
Kenshin: *Dashes over, salutes* Yes, Miss Demigoddess?  
  
RI: Assemble the entire Kenshin-gumi.  
  
Kenshin: *Winces* All of them? You've employed so many.  
  
RI: Okay, not all of them. Just the cannon fodder, the Wednesday Prince, one of the teenyboppers, (you know who) and...generally all of the main charas except the Concubine guards. But bring them here, for protection against whatever foul things may befall you. None of the Kenshin-gumi are concubines, right?  
  
Kenshin: Only if Sano is, Miss Idoru.  
  
RI: *shudders* No, the Manga-ka Idoru and the ______ Idoru have charge of that. He's just one of my voices. I like him, after all, but not that way.  
  
Kenshin: ...The ______ Idoru?  
  
RI: She hasn't picked out an Idoru name yet. I know she wants to be one, though. She has to. Or else I'll blackmail her with yaoi kissing scenes with her favorite guys.  
  
Kenshin: They have yaoi with Nick Carter?  
  
RI: Anime guys.  
  
Kenshin: Oh. I should be going now, that I should. *Walks off to who knows where.*  
  
RI: Konnichiwa, everyone. I am the Rurouni Idoru, Fanfic Demigoddess, Presidentress of ORO?! Productions, and one demented little otaku. Today, we'll be-  
  
Kenshin: Miss Demigoddess, they're here...except Sano, you have to manifest him yourself, that you do.  
  
*Kaoru and Megumi are wearing chains around their ankles and wrists. They pout. Misao is lagging slightly behind them, allowed free range of motion, and chatting endlessly with, or should I say worshipping, Aoshi. Aoshi is carrying a spear and pointing it in the general direction of the girls. He rolls his eyes. Walking just as unhappily next to him is Toguro Ototo from Yu Yu Hakusho, also carrying a spear, as if to threaten the girls. On the left is Hajime Saito, and on the right is Seijuro Hiko. Or Hiko Seijuro. Not sure how it should be arranged in this case. They also point their spears boredly toward the center of their little walking circle. Yahiko is running around, laughing, mainly at the girls, but also at the drugged monkeys hanging from the celing. And just about everything else. He's bouncing around, too, obviously full of energy today.*  
  
RI: Kenshin-cha, did we give Yahiko Pixy Stix?  
  
Kenshin: Yes, I think so.  
  
RI: YAY! Anyhow, I'd like to introduce these people. *With a small pop, a rather unhappy looking Sanosuke appears.*  
  
Sano: Y'know, you were supposed to manifest me ages ago. I just decided to manifest myself finally.  
  
RI: Oh, go PMS somwhere else.  
  
Sano: Hey! PMSing is THEIR department! *Points at the "girls" in chains accusingly* *Can ya tell I don' like 'em?*  
  
RI: Good point. Now, we'll start with Kenshin-cha. Just be-flipping-cause. This is Kenshin Himura, my Secretary of Evil Defenses. He makes sure the pixies don't get out of control, Knives and the Spider Lady don't kill each other, and all sorts of good stuff like that. *applause, Kenshin bows modestly* This over here is Sanosuke Sagara, one of the priveliged few canon characters to become a voice in my head! Give him a hand, ladies and non-ladies! *more applause, Sano smiles smugly and seems to be thoroughly enjoying himself.* Here are the concubine guards, they suck, don't applaud them. *Misao claps and screams "Go Aoshi-sama!" Crickets chirp afterward.* Now the cannon fodder, Megumi Takani and Kaoru Kamiya. Feel free to jeer and throw things at them. *Sano grabs Kenshin by the arms to prevent him from stopping anything that is to happen, and the audience obliges happily. Kaoru and Megumi shriek. Saito hits himself in the head with the long wooden part of his spear that I can't remember what it's called.*  
  
Sano: *Releases Kenshin* Didn't wanna stop the fun...  
  
RI: Arigato, Sano-cha. And that ball of hyperactiveness is Yahiko Myojin, Prince of my palace, but only on Wednesdays. I'M SURE HE'LL THANK RANCHIKO'S CREATOR FOR THE PIXY STIX after he's done playing with the hopped-up monkeys.  
  
Yahiko: *Laughing hysterically*  
  
RI: By the way, I'd like to thank Megumi Takani for the drugs that made the monkeys so high in the first place.  
  
Megumi: I didn't-  
  
RI: SHUT IT! I'll have someone poke you repeatedly with a long, very pointy stick.  
  
Sano: *Jumps up and down* Can I do it? Please?  
  
RI: We'll injure her later, okies, Sano-cha?  
  
Sano: Yay! Can we have sake too?  
  
RI: We'll see.  
  
Kenshin: *Opens mouth to protest, shuts it, shakes head* Never mind...Miss Demigoddess, aren't you going to say the line?  
  
RI: The line? What line?  
  
Kenshin: The line...you thought it up five minutes ago, that you did...  
  
RI: OH! Right, the line! *clears throat, camera zooms in to face* Live, I guess, from ORO?! Productions headquarters, it's LATE THURSDAY AFTERNOON!  
  
*Cheesy music plays, and an opening squence, composed of me loose with a video camera, begins. Things like a blurry shot of my face, my best friend flipping me the bird, and lots of the sky and ground can be seen. There's a particularly funny shot of a little boy with a mushroom haircut running around wearing nothing but underpants and a strapless bra.*  
  
RI: *voiceover* It's "When the Flip Ever!" Starring a bunch of people who are too numerous to name right now, because I'm flippin' lazy!  
  
*The opening cuts to the Rurouni Idoru and a bunch of anime girls crowding around the video camera*  
  
RI: Is it...is it on?  
  
Girl who looks suspiciously like RI only in anime form: It's gotta be, the light's on.  
  
Girl with two cherry-red pigtail braids (that's a hint to where she's from, by the way): Maybe it's the off light?  
  
Girl who looks like RI: You been watchin' Friends again, Kyoko?  
  
Girl (Kyoko): Yeah...'Niichan likes Rachel.  
  
Sano: *in corner* EEEVIL Camera! EEEEEEEEEEVIIIIIIL!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*Cheesy music resumes*  
  
RI: *Voiceover* With musical guests the Rurouni Kenshin Omake Band! And your sexy host, me, the Rurouni Idoru! And now, ladies and non-ladies, the drop-dead gorgeous Rurouni Idoru! *RI Walks out onto stage, audience cheers*  
  
RI: *in person* *clears throat* Hey everybody! *cheering* How many of you feel like humans? *pregnant pause from audience, as if waiting* HOW MANY OF YOU FEEL LIKE TREES?! *crickets chirp, a distinct "WHAT?!" is heard from the audience* Yeah, which is why you cheer at the human part. Unless you feel like somethin' else. In which case, yell it out loudly. I, for one, feel like a sandwich. YOUKO KURAMA! I WANNA SANDWICH, NOW! *Youko Kurama walks in, wearing a strange leather getup with several confusing straps and buckles, carrying a plate with a sandwich on it.* Mmm...turkey. Now get me some chicken ramen. *he sighs, and walks away* We got what I think is gonna be a sucky show for you tonight...today, whatever...but you might like it! We got some omake, some...well, that's really it...oh, and some music, but that's really just more omake. So, now, a commercial!  
  
^#$@*$@!)%@*$(@%$*@($^#*$^#*$%(@%$&)@%$&@$&#&%!@#&%@*$*#%(@#&$*@#%^(*  
  
*Sano appears on screen* *He is hiding behind a peice of plexiglass with a microphone on it* Sano: Has your soul been stolen by that evil device known as a camera? Did you wake up in the sewers the next morning?  
  
*A girl with short black hair in a half bun and a pink kimono appears* Girl: Did Shishio the mummy and his Legion of the Undead separate your body from your spirit and make you a member of the so-called "Juppongatana," which is French for "Legion of the Undead?"  
  
*Yahiko appears on screen, sucking on one end of one of those giant Pixy Stix* Yahiko: Did an insane Mary-Sue writer deform your identity by making you look wussy and useless? Wait, why do I hafta say that one?!  
  
*Kenshin appears on screen* Kenshin: *reading off of a piece of paper* Were you attacked by a slightly human-shaped bovine because you had a sword, and have been persecuted for killing lots of people when it was only your job?...*looks up* Oro, what is this?  
  
*The Koneko Idoru appears on screen* KI: Have you been robbed by a psycho with a sleep mask on over his eyes after the Kao fell in a pit? Did it suck?  
  
*Megumi appears on screen* Megumi: Are you still secretly making drugs even though no one knows about it, and not only selling those drugs to others, but using them yourself so you can think you're attractive and you can pick the man you want? *raises eyebrow scarily*  
  
*Kaoru appears on screen* Kaoru: Okay, I'm here, what did you-*a brick falls onto her head from above* *much laughter is heard from offscreen*  
  
*Black haired girl from before appears again* Girl: We at the Chibusa...okay, who named it that?! *Sano is heard laughing offscreen* Well, it's too late now, but I'm gonna hurt you later. We at the law offices of Chibusa and...Sanos? SANO! QUIT MESSIN' WITH THE CUE CARDS! Chibusa and SONS will fight for you! Call 1-800-HLYCRAP. That's 1-800- HLYCRAP. *The enitre group from the commercial, except Kaoru and Megumi, are shown dancing. Yahiko is staring at the black haired girl, as she waves a hand in front of his face* Sano: *still behind plexiglass* And not only will we win (*coughthroughtheiveryandtrickerycough*), we'll take you out to celebrate! With sake! And lots of it! *A happy ad-libbed logo on a piece of lined paper is shown, reading "Chibusa and Sons" in messy handwriting.* Monotonous female-sounding voice: *very fast* Wecannothelpyouifyouaremakingdrugsunlessyoucanpayreallywell.Youwillalsohavet opayforthesakecelebrationafterwards.Lackofmurderstothosenotonyoursidenotguar anteed.Weareverydangerousandshouldreallynotbetrusted. %^#*@%$(@%$(#^$(%#(%^@*$%#*%^@%^#*%^#*%^@(%&#&%^#(%&#(%*#$^#(%^#%!@*%^#  
  
*Aoshi appears on screen, running for his life, screaming like a girl. A storm of chocolate chip cookies follows after him, some of them flaming. After the cookies, the Rurouni Idoru runs in the same direction.*  
  
RI: Fly, my pretties, FLY! *maniacal laughter*  
  
*The Chips Ahoy logo appears on screen, only instead of "Ahoy," it says "Aoshi."*  
  
Stupid goofy voiceover: A thousand chips Aoshi! *Ding!*  
  
&#*$&*#^$()^)@%$(^*%*(^*$%#&%^#%*#^&*%$@&%^#*@$*(#$!*$%@*%^@^&$*^#($@#&%  
  
*Sano, again appears on screen.*Sano: The Meiji Government: *thumbs up* it sucks! *thumbs down* We got losers like Saito on the police force, no one can carry any sort of defense anymore, Captain Sagara was executed for no good reason, men are slashin' apart their wives, and...K-Kenshin...why are you lookin' at me like that? Kenshin, your eyes...they're all...gold...Kenshin, put that sakabatou away right now...Kenshin, put the sword down...*turns around and runs like the wind* MOMMY! I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! AND WAY TOO PRETTY!  
  
Words on screen: THIS MESSAGE BROUGHT TO YOU BY SANOSUKE SAGARA.  
  
%$&$%@^&$%#&%$*(@%#&*$%@*$^&#%@%^*$%@&*$(@%$&*@$%^@#$&$%@#$&@$#^  
  
Rurouni Idoru: And now, ladies and non-ladies, the Rurouni Kenshin Omake band!  
  
*On a stage are Sano, the black haired girl from the commercial, Kenshin, and a girl with wild, messy-looking light brown hair. Sano holds a microphone. He's wearing a white tank top with the "aku" kanji on it and fairly baggy jeans. The black haired girl is standing at a keyboard that says "Ranchi" in katakana, which is her name. She's wearing a blue halter top bearing the NyQuil logo, a red miniskirt, a black studded belt, and high heeled boots. She has a nose ring, and lots of earrings. There's a red streak in the middle of her hair. Kenshin has his hair down, his right ear pierced, and a red tank top on. Due to the drum set he's sitting at, anything else is impossible to see. The big drum up front (no clue what kind of drum is is) reads RK in big letters and the katakana for "Rurouni Kenshin" underneath. Scribbled along the right hand side are the words "Saito needs a cookie." At the bottom, another note is scribbled, reading "Eat more bannanas." The brunette girl is holding a blue electric guitar. She's wearing cutoff baggy jeans, and a v-necked shirt that says "REBEL" on it. She had about as many earrings as Ranchi, and an eyebrow ring. The poeple on the instruments begin to play a tune, and Sano lifts the microphone. Ranchi is playing a bass sound on the keyboard, due to lack of a bass player.*  
  
Sano: Pretty women out walking with gorillas down my street From my window I'm staring while my coffee goes cold Look over there  
  
Others: Where?  
  
There, there's a lady that I used to know She's married now or engaged or something so I'm told  
  
All: Is she really going out with him? Is she really gonna take him home tonight? Is she really going out with him? 'Cause if my eyes don't deceive me There's something going wrong around here  
  
Sano: Tonight's the night when I go to all the parties down my street I wash my hair and I kid myself, I look real smooth Look over there  
  
Others: Where?  
  
Sano: There, Here comes Amy with her new boyfriend They say that looks don't count for much And so there goes your proof  
  
All: Is she really going out with him? Is she really gonna take him home tonight? Is she really going out with him? 'Cause if my eyes don't deceive me There's something going wrong around here Around here  
  
Sano: But if looks could kill There's a man there who's marked down as dead 'Cause I've had my fill Listen you Take your hands from her head I get so mean around the scene Hey, hey, hey  
  
All: Is she really going out with him? Is she really gonna take him home tonight? Is she really going out with him? 'Cause if my eyes don't deceive me There's something going wrong around here Around here  
  
Sano: Something going wrong around here Something going wrong around here Something going wrong around here Something going wrong around *Sano puts the microphone in the stand. Kenshin and the girls play one final chord.* *Applause*  
  
^*(%#$*$)$@^%(&$%$%%($*%^#%^&$&($^@%$^$^&(%^&#%$@#$@$^&^%^(&*$%^#%^&#$*  
  
Rurouni Idoru: *grins evilly* This is a Saturday Night Live parody! Of course there's gonna be a commercial right after the musical performance!  
  
$!&*@#&*($&(%$*$(&#(%@(&%#*$&!%$^*#@!@#$%^&*()(#!!@^$#&%&($&)*(&^%$@!@$*!$  
  
*Saito appears on screen, holding a cigarette and looking, what else, serious.* Saito: *quietly* My name is Hajime Saito, and I would like to tell you the dangers of smoking cigarettes. Do not *loudly* SMOKE THEM! You can get cancer if you SMOKE THESE DELICIOUS CIGARETTES! They are a drug, you will become addicted. If you start smoking, pretty soon you will find that YOU NEED TO SMOKE THESE WONDERFUL THINGS! IF YOU don'tlistenwhenIsay DON'T SMOKE, YOU'LL DIE! Don't listen to someone who says that CIGARETTES ARE GOOD, AND FANTASIC, AND GREAT! It's only a myth that CIGARETTES CAN MAKE YOU MORE ATTRACTIVE! It's not true that WHEN YOU SMOKE, YOU LOSE WEIGHT! So don't SMOKE!  
  
*camera pans to Kenshin and the Rurouni Idoru, who are sitting offstage.*  
  
Kenshin: This is horrible, that it is! We shouldn't be doing this! That we shouldn't! Why are you letting him do that, Miss Demigoddess?  
  
RI: *Grins evilly, and fans out several hundred-dollar bills* He payed me lots of money.  
  
%!*(#%$!!@#$%^&*())(*^$#@!@!$@&^#@!%^*(%#$%^*%^&#$%^*(#$#$@%^*$%$#%@#$%*&!(%  
  
*The camera pans slowly over cookies, as if the cookies are seductive.*  
  
Sano: *voiceover* Why do I have my name put on yuppie cookies? I don't wanna sell yuppie cookies! I'd never eat these things. Put my name on a brand of sake! That I could advertise! Yeah, Sanosuke sake! That'd kick a- *someone is heard clearing their throat* Oh, right. Milsanos. They have chocolate and all sorts of other good crap in 'em. Why do I hafta advertise 'em?  
  
RI: *voiceover* Would you rather I called them Milsaitos? Or had you advertise chicken?  
  
Sano: You make your point! Milsanos, they really kick a-  
  
RI: SANO!  
  
Sano:...Butt.  
  
$@*!#&^*%&(&%^$!#!@#$%^&*()(*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*(%#&@%$#$^&!$^#^&*!$%$^%$@!$%^  
  
*Yahiko is shown on screen, giggling hysterically, sitting in a chair, an open pack of Pixy Stix next to him.*  
  
Ranchi (remember, from the band and the commercial?): *behind Yahiko*See how much Banana-chan's enjoying them? Right, Banana? *bends over in front of Yahiko, facing him, smiling sweetly, and accidentally giving him an eyeful of clevage. Blood spurts from Yahiko's nose, and his chair tips over* Oh, sh*beep*...  
  
*Sano is heard laughing loudly from offscreen*  
  
Kenshin: *offscreen* I knew the bend was a bad idea, that I did, at least at the waist, I still say you should have bent at the knees...  
  
Ranchi: Crap, Banana? Banana-chan? Crap, what WAS his real name? I need someone to write it down for me, I really do...oh, right! The commercial! *turns to face camera* Pixy Stix: Flavored sugar in a flimsy hollow cylinder. Yum. *turns back to Yahiko* Banana? Banana?  
  
%@*(@%(@$^&@%*%#^)*#!^&$#!*@$&*!#@*%$#&(&!$@&!#$@&$&(%@!^*&*^@!!%$@$#*  
  
*Rurouni Idoru is shown on screen, in front of two lavender-sheeted beds, one with another girl sleeping on it, in a very messy bedroom* RI: Hey! The Rurouni Idoru here, in my cousin's, the Butou Idoru's, bedroom. After staying here for a week and a half, and making two more Idorus, I have decided! If you are a girl of the age of...well, if you get most of my sick humor and find it funny, you're immature enough, an obsessed otaku like me and my pals-es, and want to join the ORO?! Productions staff, just e-mail me! Hunt around a little, you'll find it. There is no pay, but concubines and a nifty title! Plus omnipotent powers! Just type something about "Idoru"s in the subject line, I'll get it. Tell me what kind of Idoru you wanna be, and I'll see what we can do! Remeber, ORO?! Productions wants YOU! *points at the camera* Oh, and ignore my sleeping cousin, it's only two in the morning...  
  
%@&*#(!$&(@^$^#$#!%&*%^#%$@%$^&%^%&#*(%^#%$@!$^@#*$*%@*%#@^*(^@%@%$!#  
  
*Back at ORO?! Productions headquarters, Yahiko is snoozing on the floor, Megumi and Kaoru are covered in squished tomatoes, Sano's drunk out of his mind, and the Rurouni Idoru is sitting in a big plush chair, only her head and knees are on the arms of the chair.*  
  
RI: Well, that's our show for now, tune in when the flip ever, I might have a new episo-*thump-thump-thump th-th-thump* Ah, crap...*gets up, walks over to the source of the noise*  
  
Sano: *In a messy heap at the bottom of a staircase* *slurring* Wh-who put those stairs there?  
  
RI: Note to self: Never give YOU sake again!  
  
Sano: *off-key, and slurring* But if looks could kill, there's a man there who's maaarked doooown as dead...  
  
RI: Great. Yahiko's in a sugar-low, Sano's drunk, and no one wants to play "Throw Stuff at the Cannon Fodder" anymore. *pout* Oh well. CONCUBINES! Take me to bed, and tuck me in! I have a big day tommorrow! *Several bishonen, including, but not limited to, Mirai Trunks, Sesshomaru, Youko Kurama, Sapphire, and Mousse pick me up gently and carry me off, most of them grumbling unhappily.*  
  
*Lights go out. Everyone who is still in their right mind or awake leaves.*  
  
Sano: Hey, why'zisso dark? Where'd ev'rybody go? *A loud thud, followed by loud snoring is heard*  
  
$#&*$%$^&@$%^*(%^#$%@#$!#$%$^&%^#$@$#%^$^&$%^#%$@#$%#$%$^%!#^&$#&*%#@!^*(%#$ #^$*$&$%*@$#^@^W$%@*%^&$%@#!$^&^&*%^&$%$&*^(  
  
A/N: So? How much did it suck? It was hard...But rest assured, I have other ideas for the next episode! Be prepared for Church Chat with Wolfwood, Massive Headwound Hiko, and Whenever Update with whoever I pick by then. "Chibusa," incidentally, (Not to be confused with Chibi-Usa) means "breast," which is why I had Sano put that down. The anime girls who seem to have no relevance are either my characters, or my best friend's. The Koneko Idoru thing was done with her full permission and laughter, and it makes more sense if you've read "Foreshadowing: The Kenshin-gumi on...". It's hilarious, go read it. At for the name "Bananaquack," none of us know why we call Yahiko that. Ranchiko, the girl with the black hair, is my RK character in most of my fics, and she can't remember Yahiko's name to save her life. She's said it a few times, but she was being pretty serious during those few times, so, she calls him Banana, or Bananaquack. This makes it very hard for Yahiko, who finds her very pretty. It also puts him in a tight spot if Ranchi and Tsubame are in the same room together, because Ranchi finds the relationship between Yahiko and Tsubame positively adorable. "Bananas" was purposely misspelled on that drum, it was supposed to have been written by Sano. "Saito needs a cookie" was supposed to have been written by Ranchi, and that line comes to me from Zora's mind, so I stole that from her. Don't even know her. Loved the line, though. Any other questions, e-mail me about them, just, make sure you put "Rurouni Idoru" in the subject line. Otherwise, I'll probably delete it. Ja ne and Beh-da! (P.S., I don't care about reviews, but they'd make me feel well known.) 


	2. Friday Afternoon Live!

%^&%$^&@#%^&#$^&*($%^$%^$%^#%$%!#$^%&^$#%^#%$@%^^@#$%*$#&!@#$^$^&@#$&  
  
A/N: Well, I'm back for more! Surprised? I know I am. Well, anyhow, enough of my blabber, here goes!  
  
Disclaimer: No, I don't own anything that we know is copyrighted. But ORO?! Productions belongs to me and all of the other Idorus. We'll share, if you wanna join...please...before school starts, and I have enough time to induct new Idorus...  
  
%!@*($@#%*(#$%$&^*(^#$!^^&%!^&*@&*(@$(*%#^#$!@#&%^@$!#$%*$#%&*(#$!#$!*%&*(%  
  
Kenshin: Oro, I thought you said you didn't want the concubine guards, that I did.  
  
RI: No, Kenshin-cha, that was last episode. This is this episode.  
  
Kenshin: Alright, Miss Demigoddess, but are you sure sensei is right for the part?  
  
RI: Yeah, I had him and Sano get good and sloshed. Anybody could do something like that with such a blood alcohol level.  
  
Kenshin: Sensei I can understand, but Sano...?  
  
RI: In case he was a social drinker. Sano sure as flip is.  
  
Kenshin: What if he hadn't been?  
  
RI: I'd pretend I was worried about Sano's liver or something and drag him back into my head.  
  
Kenshin: *blink blink* Amazing, that it is...  
  
RI: And the beauty is, they'd both be so drunk, they'd forget I gave them the booze in the first place. I got into three advanced classes for a reason...well, two, really, but close enough.  
  
Kenshin: ...ORO?!  
  
RI: What, what happened?  
  
Kenshin: The camera's on! We're live, that we are! The audience has seen the whole conversation, that they have! They know!  
  
RI: Oh...crap...um...*dances strangely as if trying to distract them*  
  
Kenshin: I don't think that will work, that I don't...  
  
RI: I know, I'm just stalling for time. *twirls*  
  
Studio Audience: *Patronizing glare*  
  
RI: Okay, okay, I know. I'm a terrible person, getting my employees drunk for the sake of ratings, but in my defense, I have one thing to say...  
  
*camera zooms in on face* LIVE FROM ORO?! PRODUCTIONS HEADQUARTERS, IT'S FRIDAY AFTERNOON!  
  
Kenshin: Oro, this is not the opening we talked about, that it isn't...  
  
*Cheesy music plays, and an opening squence, composed of me loose with a video camera, begins. Things like a messy bedroom, me accidentally hitting my nephew in the head with his own knee, and lots of rugs and celings can be seen. There's a particularly funny shot of myself and the Koneko Idoru throwing pool water at each other from bowls.*  
  
RI: *voiceover* It's "When the Flip Ever!" Starring a bunch of people who are too numerous to name right now, because I'm flippin' lazy!  
  
*The opening cuts to Sano running away screaming from the video camera*  
  
Sano: SEWERS! DON'T TAKE MY SOUL! OKAY, FINE, TAKE MY SOUL, BUT PLEASE, PLEASE DON'T TAKE MY PRETTY! I'M TOO SEXY FOR THIS!  
  
RI: *behind camera* Sano, Sano, no it's off! I think...is that the off light? *goes in front of camera* Ah crap. MI-CHAN! HOW THE FLIP DO YOU TURN THIS OFF?! MIIIII-CHAAAAN! *the shot gets very blurry and shaky, as I am running with the camera.*  
  
*Cheesy music resumes*  
  
RI: *Voiceover* With musical guest Junko Hillsburg Sullivan Saverem the First! Jeeze, I made that up, and I can't even remember it... And, of course, your beautiful host, me, the Rurouni Idoru! And now, ladies and non- ladies, the very attractive Rurouni Idoru! *RI Walks out onto stage, audience cheers*  
  
RI: Thank you! Thank you, thank you, and eff you! In the words of Denis Leary, of course. He was one of the two reasons Ranchiko's shirt said NyQuil last episode. The other was Lewis Black. Now, this is a very special episode, because it's a very special day! That's right, the Rurouni Idoru's best friend is returning from Colombia! She called me a little while ago from Miami! WHOO! *applause* She should be here at about eight, so I'll be gone then. Probably finish this episode later tonight or earlier tommorrow. But, rest assured, we got all sorts 'a irrelevant crap for you now! Such as this sketch!  
  
%#^*#$&*#*%($^%$*$&*&#@&$#*@%$#%^^&#%^&$%$%^!^#$(*^$%&%*)^#$%(%&@#$#%&$  
  
Kenshin: *voiceover* And now, it's time for Church Chat, with the Church Lady, that it is.  
  
*Nicholas D. Wolfwood sits unhappily at a desk, wearing a gray wig, glasses, and makeup. There's a cigarette in his mouth, and he has his arms crossed over his purple-bloused chest. The cross punisher is behind his chair.*  
  
Wolfwood: I told you already, I'm not doing this.  
  
RI: *voiceover* Eff yes you are, priest boy! Now get the cigarette out of your mouth and talk about how you're the only one who doesn't constantly sin!  
  
Wolfwood: But that's not true!  
  
RI: *voiceover* Why it's called acting, Wolfwood. Now be a stuffy ol' lady for me, or I'm cutting your pay.  
  
Wolfwood: You're not paying me!  
  
RI: Oh. Yeah. Well, c'mon, you're doing it. Now, Wolf-boy, now!  
  
Wolfwood: I'm not doing this.  
  
RI: *falsely innocent* Then why are you dressed up like that?  
  
Wolfwood: *exact same tone as RI* Because you tied me down.  
  
RI: You know, if you Trigun guys had brains, you'd be REALLY flippin' dangerous! I mean, destroy July, kill some kids, take over the planet, sure. But if you really gained some I.Q., you would cause the need for another Project SEEDS ship to take off.  
  
Wolfwood: What do you mean?  
  
RI: I ain't tellin' you! You'll shoot up my entire set!  
  
Wolfwood: *turns around* Hey, I forgot you let me keep that.  
  
RI: Only with persuasion from Kenshin.  
  
Wolfwood: ...I found it, y'know.  
  
RI: I know. And now you're gonna make big boomy explosion things and break stuff and escape.  
  
Wolfwood: You don't mind?  
  
RI: Actually, I was hoping that'd be how you'd end the Church Chat sketch.  
  
Wolfwood: Alright. *whips out the cross punisher, does his cool "Priest- with-a-giagantic-cross-shaped-gun" thing, shoots up the entire Church Chat set.*  
  
RI: Nicholas D. Wolfwood, ladies and non-ladies. *applause*  
  
$^*%#*()$#$%^*@$#*%!#$@!$%$!@#$%^&*)(*&^%$#@!%&*@$^*@#%^$@&!&*$^@%$(#@&$  
  
Sano: *offscreen* You're a genius!  
  
*Yahiko appears on screen.* Yahiko: Were you or someone you know mercilessly slaughtered by the Hitokiri Battousai during the Bakumatsu? *looks to the side* Was that mature enough?  
  
*Saito appears on screen* Saito: This is stupid. I'm not going to be in your stupid commercial.  
  
Offscreen voice: We'll give you cigarettes!  
  
Another offscreen voice: Hey! Those're mine!  
  
Saito: *clears throat, looks at camera* Were you in a fight with the Battousai, where you received scars that will not heal? Was your physical appearance damaged permanently because of it? Have you, over the years, become horribly deformed and...*raises eyebrow* Is there a reason I was given such a line?  
  
*laughing is heard offscreen*  
  
RI: *offscreen* Sano's a comic genius, it was too good! I'm sorry! I couldn't pass it up!  
  
Sano: *laughing hysterically offscreen*  
  
Saito: Aku Soku Zan, tori-atama...  
  
Sano: Ooh, that supposed to scare me?  
  
Saito: Well, since your back says "Aku," yes it is. I'm supposed to kill you immediately.  
  
Sano: Which you haven't done.  
  
Saito: I'm waiting for the perfect time to strike.  
  
RI: *offsceen* Oh, flip this, Yahiko, the line!  
  
Yahiko: *pushes past Saito* We'll give you comp...comp...how d'you say that?  
  
RI: *offscreen* Compensation.  
  
Yahiko: ...Compensation for Battousai injuries. All winnigs come from the Battousai's own pocket.  
  
Sano: *loudly* Say the name!  
  
Yahiko: Whaddya mean?  
  
Sano: Say "Chibusa and Sanos!"  
  
RI: *offscreen* Moron, you just did.  
  
Sano: Oh, yeah...  
  
RI: *Sighs, walks in front of camera* Call 1-800-HLYCRAP. Beh-da.  
  
Monotonous female-sounding voice: *very fast* BattousaicompensationmoneydoesnotinfactcomefromtheBattousaihimself.Ithasbeen moochedoffoftheKaowoman.ItwillprobablycostyoumorethanyoumakebecausetheKenshi n- gumiisbrokeandneedsmoney.Notallcasesapproved,especiallynotifyouarelookingfor revengeortitles.  
  
^&*($^$&*&*^#^$^@$^&*^()%$@#$%&*&()*(%$!@%&*)*(^#$!#$%$**(&*(%@#@#^!^&*!%#$&  
  
*Sano is shown, sitting unhappily on a rock, head in hands. Chickens are running around him, squaking. The backdrop is a cheesy looking bright blue sky and big green field with symmetrical, opaque clouds, and a smiling sun, who is wearing sunglasses, and apparently singing.*  
  
Sano: ............................................................*blink, blink*...........................So...why am I sitting here with chickens and a jazz-playing sun? I seem to have forgotten.  
  
RI: *offscreen* It's a commercial.  
  
Sano: What could it possibly be a commercial for? I'm sitting on a rock, with chickens, and this thing back here that looks like Yahiko drew it-  
  
Yahiko: *offscreen* Hey!  
  
Sano: -So what is this advertising?  
  
RI: Um...  
  
Sano: What?!  
  
RI: We haven't decided what it's for yet.  
  
Sano: *through clenched teeth* So then why are we filming it?  
  
RI: I can't...Yahiko, tell him.  
  
Yahiko: It just seemed really funny.  
  
Sano: I'm gonna kick your...  
  
Yahiko: Calm down! The Demigoddess, she wanted me to, and I really do owe her for giving Ranchiko life and...*raves about Ranchiko*  
  
Sano: *raises eyebrow* Can we end this stupid thing?  
  
RI: Sure.  
  
Sano: You'll never air this, right?  
  
RI: 'Course not.  
  
^%&@#!&#%!*#%!%@*!$&*(!$)!%!^#!*!@)!$%!%!@(!%@&~^!&%@)!%@%&!(!%@&!^&$%$@!  
  
*A shot of Megumi dancing on tables, men looking up her kimono, and eventually falling off a table into the arms of an old man plays.*  
  
*Kenshin appears on screen* Kenshin: Say no to drugs, kids. It's easy. Just say no.  
  
%!*@$!(@$!)^&#&!$@%!*#^&!(&*^&%$!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!%^&*%!&@$!^!*)!(%!@#$&!#$%$#  
  
RI: *in costume, amongst what looks like a party of some sort* *to Vash the Stampede* Wow, Michael, the party seems to be going great!  
  
Vash: *swallows the 3 donuts in his mouth* Yeah! Especially with all these donuts! *eats another donut*  
  
RI: *clears throat loudly*  
  
Vash: Oh, yeah, right. But it might not stay so great, Rebecca.  
  
RI: What do you mean, Michael?  
  
Vash: For one, we're running out of donuts. But more importantly to the storyline, I had to invite someone from work.  
  
RI: Who?  
  
Vash: *dramatic pause* Hiko. *RI looks terrified, as the words MASSIVE HEADWOUND HIKO appear on screen. Doinky music plays.*  
  
Yahiko: *voiceover* It's Massive Headwound Hiko! Today's episode: The Cocktail Party!  
  
RI: Hiko?! Why him?!  
  
Vash: He heard me talking about it, I had to invite him!  
  
RI: We're in deep crap. *Vash nods.*  
  
*A thoroughly wasted Hiko, wearing a cap shaped like a brain covered in cherry cake-gel, walks in*  
  
Hiko: So I said, "Kuzu Ryu-*Thud. Hiko falls to the floor face-first.* *Notaro, Kuroneko-sama, Ai the Tabby, and several other dogs and cats walk over and begin licking the cake gel off. Notaro tries to steal the cap off of Hiko's head. Notaro thoroughly succeeds, and wanders off to bury it, the other animals following him, for hopes of another lick of it.*  
  
Kenshin: *runs up from offstage* MOMMY!  
  
RI: Wait, Kenshin, you're not in this ske-*turns around slowly* Sanosuke?  
  
Sano: *also totally smashed* Yeeeeees?  
  
RI: Did you give Kenshin sake?  
  
Sano: *slurring* Well, he jus' seemed so sad, and I though' some sake migh' make him feeeeel better. *Hiccups, and he, too, falls over landing square on his bottom.*  
  
RI: *looks very unamused, whips out a bat from hammerspace, and attempts to hit a home run with Sano's head. However, Sano's head is attached firmly to his body, simply causing him a concusssion.* This is gonna su-uh-uuuuuck...  
  
Kenshin: *hugs Hiko* Mommy! I love you, Mommy...  
  
Hiko: *sniffle, sits up, hugs Kenshin* C'mere, son...  
  
RI: Oh, Goddess...  
  
Hiko: I'm so happy...I finally have a family of my own...  
  
Kenshin: I love you so much, Mommy...  
  
RI: Oh dear sweet Lordess...Cut to commercial! FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS SACRED, HOLY AND/OR SALTY, CUT TO COMMERCIAL!  
  
#!&@$!*#%!(*%$@%&!@#$%^&*()(*^%$@!&@$&$*$#%@%@$&$*@^@*$*&%@$*%#&*(&#^  
  
Deep Female Voiceover: It is the attitude? *Black and white shot of Ranchiko wearing jeans and a tank top, looking disdainful and giving the camera the finger* No. No it isn't. Is it the angst? *Black and white shot of Yahiko practicing with his bokken, looking disdainful, and wearing jeans and a t-shirt.* No. That has nothing to do with it. Is it the money? *B&W shot of Ranchi and Yahiko throwing money around, as if extremely happy to have so much, but, you guessed it, they look disdainful. Also, both still wearing the trendy clothes.* Maybe a little. Is it the Pixy Stix? *B&W shot of Ranchi and Yahiko, in the same clothes as before, disdainfully eating Pixy Stix.* Not one little bit. Is it the pants? *B&W shot of Ranchi and Yahiko posing disdainfully* Yes. Yes it is. Meiji Jeans. *Ranchi puts her arm around Yahiko protectively, Yahiko instantly spurts a nosebleed, losing the disdainful look, and Ranchi turns around, looking extremely worried*  
  
%*%$!&@$*($!&@#^(%@!%#@&!@#$^%#(&%&$&#^%*$@(&$#!@^&$^$*&#$&&#@^*%@!&!  
  
Kenshin: *voiceover* Oro, I don't want to relive this...*shot of Kenshin being hit by a hammer wielded by Kaoru*  
  
RI: *voiceover* WELL TOO BAD! You're gonna! If I had to film it, You hafta remember it! *Shot of RI spinning camera, picking up Vash the Stampede, and throwing him at a bunch of rabid fangirls, then taking her place at the camera again, and giving a thumbs-up.*  
  
Kenshin: *voiceover* Now do you really have to put that in? *Shot of the Koneko Idoru giving Kenshin a paperclip, fifty cents, and a how to be a talk show host guide while Kenshin holds a telephone to his ear.*  
  
RI: *voiceover* Of course we do! *Shot of Millions Knives, or...whatever, trying to smile sexy, and ending up looking like a crack-addicted pychopath. Which he is.*  
  
Kenshin: *voiceover* Oro, jut tell them about the show... *Shot of Kenshin talking desperately to KI*  
  
RI: *voiceover* My pleasure! Hansu: Just...talk. On the Idoru Network at...um...crap, you think we should find out what time they're on before we promote them? *Shot of Vash flopping around like a noodle on the floor, and Kenshin about to spring into action*  
  
Kenshin: Yes, I think so, that I do. *shot of Kenshin running accross the stage, screaming. Kaoru chases him. On the KI's command, several geeky guys shoot tranqulizers at her*  
  
%!*@$()!*$^%@&*#%&*#^!%@*@$#*!$#*&#%#%^%!*@%!^*#&#%$@^&!%@#&!^@!$#$!&*^#  
  
RI: And now, ladies and non-ladies, Junko Hillsburg Sullivan Saverem the first.  
  
*A girl done in Trigun style, but with a rounder face than most Trigun charas, stands, smiling shyly, on the stage. Her hair is dirty/honey blonde, her eyes light blue, and she's wearing a simple pink sleeveless shirt and knee-length dark-pink skirt. On her feet are pink sandals. She wears a bunch of rings and bracelets on her left arm, and two shell necklaces. She picks up the microphone as the band behind her begins playing.*  
  
Junko: *smile widens*You ask me why I change the color of my hair, yeah  
  
You ask me why I need thirty two pairs of shoes to wear  
  
You seem to ask me why I got a lot of things, it's just a chick thing  
  
You ought to let it go and try to understand but you don't have a clue.  
  
That's what girls do  
  
They keep you guessing the whole day through  
  
Play your emotions push all your buttons it's true  
  
That's what girls do  
  
You ask me why I gotta play so hard to get, yeah  
  
You ask me do I play it cool just to make you sweat, yeah  
  
You want some kind of explanation I can give  
  
It's just a chick thing that you're messin' with  
  
To me it's black and and white  
  
But to you it's not getting through to you.  
  
That's what girls do  
  
They keep you guessing the whole day through  
  
Play your emotions push all your buttons it's true  
  
That's what girls do  
  
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, why should I change?  
  
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, I'm havin' too much fun.  
  
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, to you it's confusing  
  
To me it's nothing new..  
  
That's what girls do  
  
That's what girls do  
  
They keep you guessing the whole day through  
  
Play your emotions push all your buttons it's true  
  
That's what girls.  
  
That's what girls do  
  
They keep you guessing the whole day through  
  
Play your emotions push all your buttons it's true  
  
That's what girls do  
  
That's what girls do  
  
They keep you guessing the whole day through  
  
Play all your emotions push all your buttons it's true  
  
That's what girls do  
  
That's what girls do  
  
That's what girls go  
  
Girls  
  
You ask me why I change the color of my hair yeah...*she puts the microphone back in its stand, bows, and walks off the stage, tripping once in the journey.**Applause, but not for the trip, for the singing.*  
  
%!@*#%!&#&%^@(%^@&$*@^$*^&*$#$&#!*&@^!(&^(&%^$!#$*!&#*^%(@%#*!^&#(@^#&!@*  
  
*Wolfwood appears on screen, looking serious* Wolfwood: It's five p.m. Do you know where your children are?  
  
Ranchi: *dragging right leg across camera* I sure as he** do! *She angrily pulls her right leg forward with a great heave. The camera pans down to reveal Yahiko latched to it. He blows a raspberry at Sano, who's chasing him, wanting to play "Yahiko Volleyball." Kenshin is waving his arms telling all of them to calm down. Kaoru is running after Kenshin, screaming her head off about one thing or another that they've all done wrong, which they probably have, but she deserved it.* I FEEL LIKE A MOTHER OF FOUR! *drag, drag, drag.*  
  
Wolfwood: *stares, as they leave the scene*.........Riiiiight...  
  
&@%#*!^#&*(!%#&@(!@^#()%^!$&%*^%^#$&%$%^$@&%$*%$*!%@($%@*(^$*($@*#@&#&$  
  
*RI is shown against the backdrop of her very messy bedroom.*  
  
RI: Hey! This is the Rurouni Idoru to once again remind you that, if you are an immature, whacked-out, obsessed little otaku girl like me or the Koneko Idoru, you're wanted at ORO?! Productions! Send me an e-mail about it, but make sure to type the word "Idoru" in the subject line somewhere, or I may well accidentally delete it! Tell me what kind of Idoru you wanna be, and I'll see what can be done, okies? Ja ne and beh-da! *flashes peace sign, fade out*  
  
^&$^$^@^*%*#%*($#%^$%&#$%&^&%$%&*($#%^%&*(#$*$@#$^#%!@&@%!#@*^&%$&!^%#  
  
*Sano appears on screen* Sano: Is your bladder full? Of urine? Do you have to take a leak? A whiz? A pee-pee? Do you hafta go pee-ee-ee? You gotta go to the bathroom? Well, what're you sittin' there for, GO! Make a beeline for the toilet, and don't come back until your bladder is empty!*turns around, walks off*  
  
Words on screen: THIS MESSAGE BROUGHT TO YOU BY SANOSUKE SAGARA. *the word "useless" has been scribbled over the first line, with an arrow pointing between "THIS" and "MESSAGE."*  
  
%!&#%@*#^%!*!&@#%!%#*@$#($#&*(#&%$^$#&@#%&@&*^%^@*(^*$@&%#&#&*%#*&%!^  
  
*Shot of a building. The camera angle twirls and spins around the building. Blah.* Ranchi: *voiceover* And now, from the news capital of ORO?! Productions, it's Whenever Update with Yahiko...oh that's it, huh? Oh, yeah. Yahiko Myojin and...NANYO?! RANCHIKO MASANUMI?! I CAN'T DO THE NEWS!*cut to inside the building*  
  
Ranchi: I can't beleive I'm doing the news...can someone at least make Banana-chan pay attention to his cue cards, here? He's drooling...Guys, c'mon, this ain't funny!  
  
Yahiko: *stare* *drool*  
  
Ranchi: Banana-chan...Banana-chan...*looks at cue card*....Yahiko?  
  
Yahiko: *immediately snaps out of it* You...you remembered...  
  
Ranchi: Ee-yup, now we gotta do the news.  
  
Yahiko: Oh. That sucks.  
  
Ranchi: I agree. But I guess it's either us or drunken-fest over there...*gestures toward the still drunk Hiko, Sano, and Kenshin.*  
  
Yahiko: They're still like that?  
  
Ranchi: Yeah, 'member when you accidentally drank that sake, you were a maniac for all of 5 hours! Then of course, you passed out, but still.  
  
Yahiko: *blushes* Ranchi-chan, that's...people are watching this...  
  
Ranchi: Oh, sorry, Banana-chan. Want me to tell some of my embarassing drunk stories?  
  
Yahiko: No, that's alright! You don't deserve to be embarassed! Not in front of the whole...well, all these people here! *gestures at the audience*  
  
Ranchi: Once, I got so drunk, I actually seemed to think Banana-chan was my age, and I kissed him full on the mouth...  
  
Yahiko: *Exploding nosebleed sets him off balance, and toppling backward*  
  
Ranchi: Oh, sh**! Banana? Banana? Naner-chan? Oh, not again, when the he**'s he gonna get over it?! Ba-naaa-naaaaaaaa! This is so not fair...I don't deserve this, I went to school! I lived with Misturu for eleven years! She burned down our house! More than once! *Begins banging head against the news desk*  
  
RI: *voiceover, overriding the sound of Ranchi's head-banging* The Whenever Update will not feature any news tonight, as I, the Rurouni Idoru, have not watched the news in some time, and therefore, do not know what's going on in the world. Plus, tonight's anchors are not only hopeless, but come from the Meiji Era, and thusly have no hope of understanding any of it. I pity them both.  
  
$&@%$*(@%$*@%$*@%$*$*@%$*@&*%^*%@#&%(@*%(@#*!%@#$^%&^$(%*)()(&*^&%^$  
  
*Shot of Kaoru on a wooden raft in the middle of the ocean. The waves rock her back and forth, up and down. It starts on her solemn face, but slowly zooms out to reveal the entire ugly picture. After a few seconds of just Kaoru floating, she begins to turn green, bends over, and vomits over the side of the raft.*  
  
Whispering female voiceover: Floating. The new fragrance from Kamatari Beauty Care.  
  
^&#%^&%@&(*#()%*^@$*^#!!#@$#%$^%&^*&(*)(&*^%$#@$!%$^&$^#^%&#&$&@%#^&*$!%!  
  
*A shot of RI smashing up a computer with a sledgehammer plays.*  
  
RI: *voiceover* Does this have a point? Not really, no. Just watch me bashing in my computer. It sucks. AOL sucks too. So I'll abuse that with my computer. *Bash, bash, bash.*  
  
Bashing RI: *swing* Stupid...*smash* piece...*wham* of...*shatter* CRAP!  
  
Words on screen: THIS MOMENT OF UTTER STUPIDITY BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE RUROUNI IDORU.  
  
%$@^&@#&^!%*@%^#*!&#%@^@%^@*!%$*#%!&#*!%#%!%@&#$&#!*#%^#*(!%#*%!&#*!$#$  
  
Happy girlish voiceover: Have you seen the hottest movie of the summer? There's only one week left, catch it while you still can! "FINDING RYOGA!"  
  
*Ryoga appears on screen, and a really short movie clip* Ryoga: Where the heck am I?!  
  
Voiceover girl: Join Ranma and Akane in their hunt for Ryoga!  
  
Akane: *rushes into room, where Ranma sits boredly, playing paddleball* Ranma! I can't find P-chan! Where is he?!  
  
Ranma: *paddle paddle paddle* Don't know, don't care.  
  
Voiceover girl: Don't miss it! "Finding Ryoga," now playing!  
  
%!@*#%!&#%!*#^*($^%#&(#%@^!^#$!*&($@%!*#$!*@$#&!$@#&!%#*%&#$!&#%!@$#&!$#&@  
  
*At ORO?! Productions Headquarters, Sano, Hiko, and Kenshin are passed out on the floor, Junko is eating an ice cream soda, and RI is sitting in the same arm chair as last time, in the same fashion.*  
  
RI: Well, that's our show for this evening, tune in again...eventually. Enjoy whatever comes on after this next. Ranchi, Yahiko, you're gonna hafta help me with these three...  
  
*credits, fade out.*  
  
!&@#%@&!*@%^@&#%@&*^&*$#$@$%^&$@^&^@%$@*!%$%#*!%$@*@%&@%#&@$#&@$#&@%@&%@!$@% !%@&!^@&!@%#&@^*@%@%@^&!&  
  
A/N Okay, So I'm getting a little better with the ideas. I need to watch SNL more for better ideas...Oh, and watching the news would be nice too. Insert nervous laughter here. Remember that friend who's coming home? The girl Ranchi mentioned during the Whatever Update, Mitsuru, is her RK character. They've been friends for, you can see, eleven years. Note I have not been friends with anyone that long except my cousin, being that that's only about 2 1/2 years away from my entire life. Ai the Tabby and the Don't do drugs commercial make more sense if you've read "An Encounter of the Feline Kind" by the Koneko Idoru. The commercial for "Hansu: Just...Talk" is obviously for yet another KI fic. She put a commercial for Late Thursday Afternoon Live in that fic, so, I returned the favor. It's hilarious, check it out. As for Notaro, you've never seen Episode 65 of RK, have you? It's good, go read some spoilers for it. There're some good ones at Hitokiris Anonymous...but I dunno the address for that. Go look it up. Well, I guess that's it, ja ne and beh-da! 


End file.
